Julia

It's funny how this time of the year seems to lead me to this blog. Over the last two years, I would always find myself posting at exactly this time. Is it because Feb 17 is my mother's birthday? Is there an indelible memory that links my writing to the womb that bore me? Could it be a planetary configuration? Or just plain coincidence?

I do not believe in coincidences.

I believe in what Paulo Coelho calls "synchrodestiny".

Some things in life are just bound to happen. They say that if the will is strong enough, it can materialize anything. But my will is not iron clad. In fact, my will is always weaker than my addictions.

And I am addicted to Julia Fordham.

I was introduced to her music by my friend Michele exactly 20 years ago. Julia released her first, self-titled album in 1988 and Michele brought it back for me as a present from Hong Kong. It didn't take much to get me hooked. Henceforth, I sought and bought every single album she produced. It wasn't easy in the beginning because she wasn't considered mainstream so my first copies of her work were mostly purchased by friends abroad. But after her first visit in Manila in 1994, she a fan base emerged in Manila and her subsequent move from London to Santo Monica, California, made her more accessible to her worldwide following.

The 1994 visit was very special for me. I "just happened" to be friends with the pr who handled the event and "just happened" to have been granted an exclusive interview on the sole basis of being a big fan (meaning I knew more about her music than anyone else in the lifestyle press at that time). That's when we first got acquainted on a more personal level. She was funny, gregarious, witty and highly articulate. The article practically wrote itself. And it took me weeks to recover from the thrill of meeting her up close.

Come June 1999, she was back in town for a promotional tour of the album "Falling Forward". Of course, I was again at the press conference. Of course I had another one-on-one interview. And of course, I watched the concert -- all three days. We were on first names basis by this time and I sent her clippings of the articles I wrote by post.

Barely a year later, March 2000, she was back for concerts in Manila and Cebu to promote her greatest hits collection. At the presscon, she entered the function room carrying a gift wrapped in handmade paper with gold trimmings. I was seated with some media colleagues and tried to keep my excitement in check. She looked around the room as she proceeded to take her place at the presidential table. From that raised vantaged point, she swept across the room again and finally zeroed-in at our table. She quickly crossed the room and came up to me. Cameras started clicking. "Angela! I've been looking for you! Nobody seemed to know where you were seated. Thank you so much for the lovely articles. I got you this from my favorite store in Santa Monica," she said as she handed the daintily-wrapped gift. She egged me to open it and it contained a beautiful handmade notebook in an Indian motif cover, complete with embroidery, beads and tiny mirrors. And a pen to match. On the first page, she scribbled a dedication, thanking me for my support. I wore a smile that lasted a week. That memorable event was captured by a photographer and landed on an entertainment column on the Inquirer. That same trip, I did a profile on Jules for the tv program "Pipol" and even followed her to Cebu, where I was billeted at the same resort, Plantation Bay. (Unfortunately, I didn't get to see her again after the presscon because she fell slightly ill and took to her room in the next two days so that she can recover and do the show at Waterfront. However, the day I left, she sent me a lovely letter apologizing for not having been able to do additional shots for the show.) All my staff could say was: "Grabe Ms Anj! Parang close kayo ha!" HEHEHE...

We've kept in touch by email since. I was on the mailing list of her blog and event updates, which I received regularly. At the same time, she would drop me a personal note every now and then, just to catch up. When she gave birth to her daughter, Marley, I sent her a copy of Chin-Chin Gutierrez's collection of Philippine lullabies.

She should have returned to Manila around 2004 but she found out she was pregnant and had to cancel her tours. I eagerly awaited her return until 3 weeks ago, I received an events calendar announcing that she will be in Manila for shows at the Ayala Malls on Feb 8, 9 and 10 -- exactly the same days I needed to be in Cebu for work! Ironically, she was performing in Cebu on Feb 13 -- by which time I would be back in Manila. Though it sounded discouraging, I was not disheartened. It was as though I knew deep inside that I would see her. Somehow.

True enough, that week, a fried tipped me that Julia would have an extra show on Feb 15 at the Greenbelt 3 park and that it "just happened" that the invitations were being handled by another ally! One text message was all it took to secure front row seats to the show. And so there I was, under a starlit canopy, Julia Fordham just a few paces away, serenading the audience with her best loved hits. Two rows away was the now toddler Marley, with a precocious smile and a beautiful face framed with long blonde hair.

After the show, it was announced that only special stub holders could go onstage for photo-op. I didn't have that stub. So I had to acquiesce to the VO request that "all non-stub-holders should vacate the cordoned area immediately". Took a detour to purchase her new album and voila! It led to the open-air backstage area. I stood there for a few minutes watching the burly guards securing the place. I was ready to leave without speaking with Julia. Except that I brought with me a copy of my book, A Pilgrim's Diary, which I wanted to give her. I thought of giving it through one of the PAs but everyone seemed to be busy. Then out came musical director Toti Fuentes, whom I had been introduced to before, and we struck a casual conversation. As he excused himself to leave, I asked if he can hand over my book to Julia. "Why don't you give it to her yourself? I'm sure she'll be happy to see you," he said as he led me by the hand into the secured area, entrusting me to one of the guards with the instruction that I should be brought to see Julia before she leaves.

That's when everything became a blur around me. I stood at the foot of the stage waiting for every meet and greet stub holder to finish their turn. We were not allowed to bring our cameras onstage so I was determined to focus on her and remember our encounter as clearly as I can. When I got onstage, she was finishing a conversation with Jeanne and Frances of Silk Cocoon. As she swung around, our she saw me and her face lit up. "Angela!" Then she gave me a big, tight hug -- like friends who've not seen each other for ages. "I was wondering why I haven't seen you all week! I knew someone was missing in this trip!" she enthused. I told her about the Manila-Cebu roundabout we had and she joked, "Well this show was probably put up for you! I gave her my book. She smiled delightedly and invited me to join her backstage for a quick chat... but when she got there, darling Marley was already red-faced with incessant crying. The poor dear was probably exhausted and hungry; she was wailing for her Mum. Jules carried her little girl and excused herself for a while. Seeing the she needed to bring Marley out to pacify her, she turned to me apologetically, at which I felt a bit embarassed and assured her it was perfectly understandable that she attend to Marley first. I bid her farewell and she apologized again, then added: "I promise to read your book"... Please do, I said, you can tell me what you think on email. We exchanged goodbyes again and I turned to leave the backstage area.

That night, I walked from Greenbelt to Makati Medical Center. A good several kilometers. Street sweepers were cleaning the debris from that afternoon's big rally. Ayala Avenue and other main roads were closed to traffic. People moved around me, darting from one direction to the other.

I walked and walked and walked... floating with every step.